Scary?

I know, I know, it's been 8 months since I've updated this blog. During that time, I have had some positive life changing experiences. I spent a good 3 weeks traveling all over India, experienced one week of an east coast winter, "snowpocalypse", been accepted to my first choice grad school program, and have had plenty of time to reflect and relax.

I saw this picture today and my first initial thought was not how cool these contraptions are, but empty nest syndrome...

My family will now be spread out on both coasts, LA, San Francisco, and now New York. I always wonder what my parents are going to do without us (me and my brother) at home. My mom gave me a hug the other day because I told her that my brother has a little over two weeks left and I have around 3.5 weeks left at home. Time is seriously going to FLY, it's going to be like when you want water to stay in your hands but it inevitably slips out between your fingers with no struggle.

I'm a whole bunch of nerves - excited, nervous, anxious, and scared all at once, but this move will without a doubt be a good change that will significantly impact my future. I'm so that He had this all planned for me and my brother. It maybe a challenge for both my brother and me to be in completely different environments and communities, but I always think stepping out of your comfort zone can only make you stronger. I just hope I don't come back from NY a jaded cold hearted beezy.

Let's do this.
I'm brining it, NY!
Y'all better be ready.

L-O-V-E.

Thank goodness we have long weekends :) 

I hope that everyone had an amazing three day weekend.  I always do wish that we had one more day... or better yet one more week!  This desire/wishing always happens to me, and I always suggest that the UC quarter system start an earlier fall quarter and have longer winter and spring breaks.  Wouldn't this be fantastic?!  I feel like students would appreciate going back to school more.

So, focusing on the positives of this week... 

Jo and I baked and frosted delicious chocolate (with a hint of coffee) cupcakes for some of our beloved friends at UCI.  They had all been lovebombed...<3!

 

 

lovebombed! 

This week was actually filled with many ups and downs for me all which were pretty personal and hit close to home.  I usually don't come off as being a very religious person, but I do believe that there is a God and a higher being who watches over people.  I love the concept of praying, and usually enjoy the time I spend in peace while it is just me thinking and sending my prayers to my loved ones.  I send my best wishes to my family and friends who are handling the challenges that life creates, and want to let them know that I am here right besides them.

obsessed with...

I am definitely enjoying watching the 2010 Vancouver winter Olympics.  I seriously spent hours this weekend observing the various technical skills these athletes have and what they bring to the table after years of training.  I have been rooting for South Korea and the United States of course, this is a given.  I think it's funny how I prioritize which country to support; the U.S. comes first for most categories except for speed skating, I definitely vie for Korea wining medals in that sport.  I WANT TO GO TO THE OLYMPICS and see the real action live!

Again, thank goodness for this three day weekend.
Back in Porter Ranch to relax and chill with the FAMBAM.

내 가족이 최고입니다!

Now that I am back in Irvine from winter break, I definitely feel more useful not only to myself but to others around me. I thoroughly enjoy living independently, a certain distance away from my parents. However, I have recently been feeling somewhat "guilty" for leaving the bird's nest and trying to fly out into the real world.  I understand and acknowledge that I am fully capable grown woman ready to leave and start my own life, but right now, I think I'm more worried about leaving my family than they about about me leaving.  To some degree, I am sure this is worst for my parents because they have finally raised me to their greatest abilities and the time has come to finally leave the nest.  Why am I feeling guilty that I am growing up and moving on?  Because they are my parents, the only set I will ever have, the only people who have known me since conception, the two people along with my brother who hold 90% of all the love in my heart (the other 10% goes to my friends).  They are amazing, that's why.

The concept of family is that every person holds a significant role, this is how I see it.  In my family, I know that both my parents and my brother all depend on me whether they know it or not.  My role in my family is being the connector.  When I am in Irvine, although I am not physically present at my house, I am just a one hour drive away from home and will be available for anybody.  I'm not sure if that will be the case once I graduate college.  I am still obviously part of my family, however I may not be just a hop, skip, and jump away from home.  I feel like a baby with separation anxiety from their parents once they become attached to their parents.

Happy New Decade

새해 복 많이 받으세요.

Every year my family makes food through the midnight passing into the new year, and nothing really changed this year either.  However, we did end up going to the Korean sauna on New Years Eve, entering 2010 feeling quite refreshed.  I'm not sure how to feel when I say my last meal of 2009 was spent at a Korean sauna.  Funny no?

What have I learned from this New Year?
Within the Korean culture, celebrating the new year is a big deal - all the stores close, families make large amounts of food, and the kids always 새배 [bow] to their elders.  Because I have always been exposed to this these types of customs, I do not really know how other people celebrate their New Year.  I feel like New Years is just an extension of the holidays and been trained to think the holidays equals time to spend with the fambam period.  I would feel guilty if I were not there spending time with my family.  I'm not sure how I would feel if I were not to spend entering a new year with the people I love most; my family really does come first.  I'm not sure if I will ever break this tradition and get to experience another type of New Year's celebration.  We shall see...

On the other hand, I am definitely grateful for the amazing food my mom makes ONCE A YEAR! 

Homemade 만두 [dumplings] YUM!
 
Another deliciously amazing New Years meal by my 엄마
 만두국, 갈비, 빈대덕, 고구마 튀김, 김치, and the whole nine yards

새배 to the Aunt&Uncle 

In other news...

I was reading one of my favorite websites, huffingtonpost.com and the main article was about the economy of the past decade.  Read this article.  As I was reading, the article made me feel a mixature of emotions.  I am in a way mad that the economy is in such a bad state - having one of the worst, if not the worst economic recession in American history.  I am trying very hard to have a non-partisan approach, but I really can't help but blame President George W. Bush and his administration for making such harsh mistakes!  Of course they could not predict the future, but with all the information provided, Bush, his administration, and Congress should have take better precautionary measures and made better political decisions because their actions sure as hell impacted the all Americans and the rest of the world!  Thanks to them me, thousands of other graduating college students, and millions of people living in the U.S. do not have a job.  Yippie.  Okay polictial rant done.

I will end on a happier note.

NEW YORK!  I'm gonna be back there soon...
living the east coast lifestyle! :]

Picture of one of my favorite cities in the world.

Photo credit squaregirl

Have a happy new year everyone!  Best of luck in 2010!

Oh Happy Day

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!
Hope y'all are looking forward to 2010 because I sure am. 

So my 21st Christmas has come and gone in quite a memorable fashion.  BUT, before I talk about Christmas, let's recap on the past week shall we...

I had a Yonsei reunion with some of wonderful people I met and got to know from Korea last summer while also spending the whole day with Miss Seong-Ah. We had part uno of our L.A./SoCal adventures.  Lots of driving and chatting.  :]  I think we can both say that we ALMOST came close to the whole year Seong-Ah was abroad in the "motherland".  I will post more pictures once we complete part dos.  To the left we have Seong-Ah's first visit to one of L.A.'s "historical landmarks" - Pink's Hotdog.

I also got a lovely reminder in the mail of important dates for COMMENCEMENT 2010!  Yes, I am excited and happy to graduate and have achieved success and knowledge about the world, other people, and myself, BUT I am still nervous about entering the real world.  I could picture the day of commencement to be really anti-climatic - reading the list of at least 500 social science students, pictures with friends and the fambam, dinner, and a final farewell to UCI.  Bittersweet no?

Back to the holiday mode - I must say this Christmas was unique, which can also be considered an understatement.  I don't think I have EVER eaten as much as I did during the past day and a half.  Usually, Christmas is based around "family-time" and we have a casual dinner and presents opening aka 'receive money' time, but this Christmas my Aunt went all out with the food!  This dinner could have quite possibly competed with Thanksgiving dinner.  This was the first year I got to join in on drinking alcohol legally, which was totally fun because my family definitely became happy with all that liquid in their bodies.  The next morning I woke up to Sarah Brightman's Las Vegas live concert blasting at maximum surround sound volume - fun.  I also got to watch Michael Jackson's This is it and I suprisingly enjoyed it.

 Our Korean Christmas Feast

My FamBam

The Cousins

Super Woman

Thanksgiving 2009.

Every year during Thanksgiving and the holidays I go through similar emotions. Thanksgiving is definitely the time to re-think about what and who I am grateful to have in my life. Like the other 234,203,948,209,480,934 million +1 people in the world, I am blessed to be in a loving, healthy family. I don't think I get enough opportunity to even say Thank you, I love to you to my parents or younger brother.

I had this feeling ever since I returned from D.C., my conscience is telling me that I should spend as much time with my family as possible. Then again... here I am in my final year at UCI - getting ready of entering the real world, away from home, focusing myself past a comfort zone and preparing for the worst to leave my cuckoo nest. I guess this just means, I can NEVER be away from home during the holidays unless under extraneous circumstances.

So after Thanksgiving comes what? Black Friday!
Went shopping with my family, but it was basically me and my mom in our element. I love my mama, so beautiful. Don't get the idea that I love my dad or younger brother any less, but something about that bond between a daughter and mother is something NO ONE can ever replace, not just because we went shopping, but just with my connection with my mom in general. Don't get me wrong, my mom and I have had our fair share of minor ups and downs as any relationship and I would still consider her old-fashioned and conservative, but that is my mama and no one can ever take her place. God Bless.



Thanks Mama. Love you Umma. <3